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shut up you all knew this was coming

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*settles into bed with blankets laptop headphones a drink and everything* ahh yes perfect. I have to pee. 

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"maybe you shouldnt eat all of tha-"


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talk shit get cried in front of

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hey remember that law i forget exactly how it goes but its something along the lines of ‘if you murder someone you go to jail’ whatever happened to that? is that still a thing

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am i one of those blogs that you follow but don’t actually like

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hello 911 my sock is falling down inside my shoe 

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what if rain came down all at once and not in tiny raindrops

I’m imagining thousands of people being pushed violently to the ground by a single sheet of water. It’s fucking hilarious.

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Has anyone even won a giveaway on tumblr tbh

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tell me a secret

one time in high school i was sick with strep throat but the school refused to let me leave until after lunch and i was miserable all morning. so as revenge i coughed on my hands and rubbed them all up and down the stair well railing because i was angry and miserable.

about a month later literally half the school was sick with strep and bad colds. oops.

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f is for friends who abandoned me after 8th grade

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